White feather

White feather
Slides by the window.

Wraps
Deepening heat.

Slithers.

Glides
On careless waffles of dust.

Distanced
From the flock.

Riding
The yellow breeze.

Elevating
And sinking.

Oscillating
Down into brownness.

A Nobody

Facing the void night,
Sinking.
The sky is moonless.
Much like my dark mind,
Feeling wasted and worthless.
Twisting and turning from side to side,
Tossing between one thought
And the other,
Ashamed, inadequate and
Vulnerable as ever.
Touch me somebody,
Caress my hair,
Put me to sleep.
Treat me like a crying baby.
Be my shepherd, make me your sheep.
I’m not the centre of the universe
Tonight,
Travelling beyond the ego
Crushed under the weight of desires
I’m deep under the earth below.
Liberating to evolve, evolving to liberate
From guilt,
Self-pity and low self esteem
That has taken over like an army.
I no longer deserve to dream.
I don’t want to search
For a meaning,
Into the fairy tale I wrote,
There’s nothing left of me
And my ride in this wrecked boat.
Then I look at the gloomy morning
To come, And wipe
My nothingness
That comes again and again. Takes over,
No longer sustaining my unwillingness.
When the rays light up my soul,
I’ll fly towards my abode,
And as I’m upward bound,
The flight will remind me
Of the cage I broke.
And keep my feet firmly
Planted on the ground.
And when I traverse the high mountain peaks
I won’t be swallowed by empty pride
This humbling night will remind me
That I was a nobody,
I’m a nobody.

Moment

I saw venus, the moon
And a falling star.
That night I wondered.
I wondered where you are.
And then I saw you shining through
The scarce leaves and branches
From the dark blue.

Now, amidst fading laughs
My pained feet
Walk down the path
Strewn with crunching leaves,
Alive with wild colours
Of yellows and oranges
And reds and browns,
Multiplying the angelic sounds
Of herons in flight,
Merging their white
With the sky dressed in gold
As the sun spreads its wings
And embraces
The dying night.

The trees sprinkle the morning dew,
Seeping into my thirsty skin.
And I sip the fragrance
Of the misty earth,
Swear, indulgence is mirth.
The dead fire waves it’s
Magic wand, bestows
Ash on trees.
The longer I see the blur it gets.
And ash is all I feel.

My dampened self
Drowns into the cleansing waters
Of solitude.
I look up at the clear roof
And no longer seek you.
I rub off the remains of an
Impaired dream
And stick out my neck,
Dancing underneath my own shadow,
Uncovered by the translucent surface.

I drag my mellowness,
Trip over myself.
Tripping on the cherry red robe
I’m wearing,
Counting the dripping pieces of truth.
Her hand is on my free shoulders.
I never saw those fingers before,
Tapping my back,
Running through my hair.
I gaze at the darkening
Under belly of the red.
I reach out my hand
And touch you.

The moment is stuck
And I move on
With you for company
As you pour into me
A desire to love
And a love to desire life.

Falling star-2

Look at me dear falling star,
As I watch you go down
I yearn to hold you up
And embrace you in my arms.
You didn’t have to fall
But you needed to shoot back
To where you belong.
You looked too beautiful to be true
Just before you took off.
I hope you land safely
In the lap of the sun.
And you need not worry anymore,
You no longer have shine down on me.
And I wish upon you again
As you go down;
I wish the world looks up at your grace
And watches you rise to a world
Far away from its illusions.

Falling Star

Did you fight the battle at all?
With the world outside of you
Did you crush the enemy within?
Only you know what’s true.

Was your weapon a double edged sword?
Or a shield that you placed upon your body,
To cut through your own bare skin
And make a hole in your spirited soul.

Did you know it was the last blow?
When no one read the silence in your cries,
And the cries in your silence
As you stared at the skies.

Did you call upon a fellow star,
On your way down, from the exalted vision
Of the sky, and turn against yourself
On your journey to a place without reason.

Was your own light too bright?
Blinding you and tearing you apart.
Were you on the rise as all eyes saw you fall,
Just heading back to the start.

I knock, I seek, I ask.
I still don’t know who you were,
I don’t know where you are.
I’m just burning the dead dry leaves
And watching the falling star.